Monday, December 5, 2011

butterflies, flowers and madness!

Am I crazy or emotional? Too practical or simple stupid? Lately I haven’t been able to tell the difference between my thoughts, opinions and mood swings. When you watch movies, you cry in the end because the girl gets the boy or someone dies and it’s so unbelievable that you cry. But you never think these things can happen in real life. You shrug to yourself, thinking ye to film hai yaar, what crap! But when something like that happens to you, you are dumb folded. You think, should I see a therapist, or wait my friends can hear me out or you simply keep things to yourself and pray for the best.

They say bad decisions make great stories. If Steve jobs said something like this, we would believe him, but our bad decisions just make us guilty and regretful. It’s true that we learn from them and we learn the hard way of not repeating them again for sure. But for the common man, bad decisions certainly don’t make great stories.

A few weeks ago, I was chasing an impossible dream. I was pursuing a challenge that makes me realize was not worth chasing at all from the beginning. Ah life. So I used to cry, whine and think for hours about something that was not worthy of being thought about. Like every silly girl who is in love, I fantasized and dreamt and finally woke out of my slumber. In one moment, I understood what I should have done weeks ago. TO LET GO. Three simple yet majestic words when used in the correct context. When you let go of something or someone, then you don’t have to look back or worry about it. You don’t have to torture yourself about it. You let go because clinging on is simply a waste of time.

I prayed and finally got my answer. I think God wanted me to find out on my own and make a decision myself. It happened and it happened so gracefully that I am surprised at myself.

It’s hard to forget but I think it’s harder to not forget. So here I am once again, excited for new possibilities!

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